Post Office Box 350
Beaver, WV 25813
July 18, 1996
Louv Brother Carl,
As you know sometimes it takes me a while to find the inspiration to
respond to letters, but I do make a mental note of it and always do try to get around to
it eventually. My conscience starts to bother me (which I believe is Goud's spirit
working inside of a person) when I don't take the time to reciprocate or show some kind of
appreciation for a letter or something someone has done for me. Anyway, I received your letter and as always I do enjoy hearing from you.
Now to comment on some of the things in your letter.
First let me say that I don't mind at all you sending some copies of my last letter to some of the brothers or even if you put it
on "Internet," really I'm flattered that you think it's good enough and that
other people would actually be interested in reading it. I didn't think that my
letter writing skills were that good especially since I just learned (one good thing I got
out of coming to prison) how to half-way write a letter in the last couple of years.
Plus I never did call anyone's name (in the personal things I wrote) so I don't see where
it could possibly do any harm. Shit, in fact it might even do some good. Maybe
one of those "Assholes" that I was talking about will see it and their
conscience (Goud) will start bothering them. This brings us back to the topic of
"Judas" which at one point in your letter (surprisingly) you compared yourself
to. Of course there is many ways that a "Judas" can manifest himself but I
don't see where you would fit in any of those categories. I don't know of any time
where you sold out your brothers' or friends' trust, that you betrayed for personal gain,
or to save you from some pain. I don't know of any time when you and someone were in
on something together and then you sold them out when the going got rough, or a time when
you ever turned your back on a brother in need. You've never pinned any person (by
name) to any particular event. Because you want to tell of your old experiences and
adventures that doesn't make you a "Judas," plus you tell everyone straight up
(since you've come to this frame of mind) not to tell you their secrets. You try to
stay away from people (all the old brothers that might have something to hide) that have
secrets to prevent anything from ever being told. Mind you, I don't necessarily
agree with all of your views but I don't hold them against you and I damn sure don't look
at you as a "Judas." Now I'm going to comment on some of the other aspects
of "Judas" and his judgment. Let me ask you a question, Who do you think
put it in "Judas'" heart to kill himself? Wasn't it the love that Christ
had and the goodness that he showed "Judas" that made his conscience (which I
believe is the spirit of Goud that makes it hard for a man to live with his wickedness)
bother him so much that he had to go kill himself? If you believe that Goud works
through man and knows the heart of every man then it was Goud who put it in his heart to
kill himself. I don't know if it's true or not but from what I understand suicide is
the only sin that can't be forgiven. So if you look at it from that perspective Goud
did turn "Judas into dog meat." I believe that the Bible is a parable book
and the story of "Judas" just shows that a disloyal person has not been
respected since the beginning of time.
I don't know if you heard this or not but just in case you didn't "Brother Stevie" (A.K.A. "Broke Back") got killed, by a drunken driver, in St. Louis not too long ago. I was sorry to hear it he was a good brother.
From the dungeons of "Babylon" your brother always.
P.S. If you can send me another one of those "Louv Story" pamphlets.